Monday, July 05, 2010

Coming Clean: September 2007

Pop came to the house, and I moved some of my stuff in too. This wasn't going to be easy, but I felt it to be a necessary choice.

Part of the problem was that Pop was affiliated with the Veterans Administration for his medical care. He was a combat-disabled veteran of the Korean War, so his medical care was essentially free of cost to him. While he lived on Long Island, his care was administered through the Northport facility, and a Dr. Mohammed Zarrabi. The care afforded him there was top-notch, but the facility was far from us.

We arranged for a transfer of his care to a more local place, the VA Hospital in East Orange, NJ. I'm sad to say that this hospital left much to be desired. The staff was eons away from Northport's level of humanity. It was more like a Motor Vehicle Bureau; the staff was expertly trained in the techniques of ignoring people. After one consultation, I was certain that I could not subject Pop to this sort of treatment. He and I made a mutual agreement to continue his care at Northport. It would mean a lot of driving, appointments were at the least, weekly. Sometimes more. Emergencies would mean that I'd have to stay on Long Island while he was admitted. But it was all much better than what might have taken place at East Orange.

In the meantime, I'd begun my job search in earnest. I registered at such sites as and I thought my credentials meant that it would simply be a matter of time before I was gainfully employed.

Sunday, July 04, 2010

Coming Clean: Summer 2007, Pop, etc.

After I passed the Series 14 Exam, I took a couple of days off. During that time, I discovered how sick my Father in Law, Pop, was. He was to come to live at the home of my Ex and the kids. He'd been living on his house boat, but that adventure needed to come to an end. He wasn't managing his medicines properly, and the boat was not the safest, healthiest place to be. He asked if I would take up residence at the Ex's home to help with his care. I agreed. He would need some extensive care at home, and I was figuring that the timing was sort of "fate" at work. I could do this and take a lot of the burden off of his immediate family since I was on severance and was looking for work. I was having thoughts of "karma" too. Maybe providence would look kindly on me for this.

He came to our home in September. The doctors had given him maybe 2 months.

During this time, I met with the disability insurance people to discuss possible claim options. I absolutely did not want to go this route. My thinking was, if I could work, I should work. After I signed off on declining this option, I had a few occasions where I thought it might have been a bad choice.