The Worst Ever...

Comedy is not supposed to be painful. Tragic news, sad movies, yeah those are painful, but not comedy.

Comedy is supposed to be funny. Shows that call themselves "comedies" should make you laugh.

I caught the end of the Concert for Diana on VH-1. When that ended, a show called "Best Week Ever" came on. I wound up looking for Advil. This show was that painful.

There's just something weird about watching a whole pile of Nobody's sitting around calling other, more famous people, "Nobody's", and when these Yo-Yo's do their spiels, little by-lines flash on the screen. Typically it would say, "John Doe, Comedian" or something like that. Again, comedians are supposed to be funny. I was waiting for one of these mopes to pop a lampshade on his head and do a dance.

Who decides when someone is a comedian? Is that a title you bestow on yourself?

I'm not even sure why I wrote this. I wouldn't want any of you to hurt yourself watching this monstrosity.

Ok, see ya later.

Roundabout

Some things I've heard got me thinking...

I was asked, "Why is it ok for heavy women to say nasty things about about about skinny women, but not the other way around?"

That was asked of me by a woman who considers herself heavy. She's writing a paper for a class, and she asked if I would proofread it and give her my thoughts. One of her main points in the theme was that the whole "real beauty" movement is just another example of Americans lowering the bar, and not striving to be the best we can be. She made an interesting point that in the latest issue of a popular magazine, there's an article about the American Idol winner celebrating her "curvy body", and immediately following that is an article about amazing weight loss stories. She said it sends confusing signals.

It got me thinking, for sure. What's your take on the "lowering the bar" comment?

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Someone else said to me, "funny how one of the most vile words we speak (the "F" word) is used to describe one of the most intimate acts two people can share."

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I watched my fifth episode of "Curb Your Enthusiasm" earlier. I don't think it's funny. I have never watched it before this year, and I usually insist on watching at least five episodes of a show before I feel fit to comment on it. My friends always tell me to catch it, that it's hilarious. I don't agree. I'm done with that one.

The jury is still out on, "John From Cincinnati". I'll get back to you on that.

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I Don't See Dead People

So I was watching reruns of "Still Standing" this early afternoon. It's on Lifetime a couple of times a day, and it's a great break from all the nonsense on the other channels.

Anyway, they went to commercial, and Lifetime is presenting a new series called "lisa williams: life among the dead", Mondays at 8 PM.

This show is centered around the activities of a woman named Lisa Williams, a British clairvoyant. Her claim to fame is that supposedly she can talk to the dead, and find spirits in haunted houses, etc.

Sorry. Now no one loves a good ghost story, scary spirit movie, etc., more than I do. I love the thrills of Stephen King books; I loved Poltergeist, Nightmare on Elm Street and the Exorcist.

But I don't believe in that stuff. It's a cute parlor trick, and some of these fortune tellers can be pretty slick, but I just don't buy it. It's too random, all the "messages" they claim to be hearing.

I'd love to think it's possible, I think it would be awesome if it were, but I just don't buy into any of it.

OK that's all from my brain this hour.

Oh For Crying Out DEAD!

Oh come on now. I'm sitting here watching Sunday Night Football tonight, and a commercial starts:

This Christmas...

and I hear the familiar old music.

The Theme from Rocky.

Yes he's back, and Rocky is gonna fight again.

HE'S 2000504 YEARS OLD!

ENOUGH!

The Rolling Stones are bad enough...

Celebrity Stuff

I've always been a fan of Britney Spears in the past. Not the person, because I don't know her. But I liked the act, the freshness of her talent, just the whole celebrity thing with her. Rags to riches stories always do it for me.

But I just want it on the record that I didn't care for this whole recent "photo" scandal. I had a chance to see the uncensored photos, and I passed. To me it's not "hot", it's not a turn-on, it's just kinda sad.

Seeing her take up with Paris Hilton and, worse, Lindsay Lohan just tells me that her career goals aren't on track to take her to greatness. She will eventually release a new CD, which will probably sell a kabillion copies. Going the way she is, Britney will always be rich, but she will never be "great".

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Is it just me, or was this whole "DeVito on The View" thing kinda sad? Danny DeVito was always one of the best at playing unsavory characters, over the top lunatics, and just-plain sleazebags.
But in real life, I always thought he was a class act, miles removed from any of the folks he might have portrayed.
Just seemed to me like he was the type of guy who was above the kind of nonsense he pulled the other day on that talk show.Arriving for an interview, completely inebriated,on a nationally televised show, just seems more appropriate for folks of lesser talent and quality. And watching him sitting on Rosie O'Donnell's lap like some kind of simpleton just kind of bugged me.
I still like Danny, I just think this was a little beneath someone of his caliber.

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Am I the only one on the planet who is just not stoked about "DreamGirls"?

Hmmm

NEW YORK (Nov. 2) - Flavor Flav, who's dating "Flavor of Love" winner Deelishis, is expecting a child - his seventh - with another woman, his manager, Clifton Johnson, confirmed Thursday.

Elusive Laughter

Technology offers us a little prize. When you catch something on your TV that really makes you laugh, you can just rewind it, watch it again, laugh again.

Ever notice, though, when you watch something 2 or 3 times, you don't laugh as hard as you did the first time you saw it? I wonder why that is? What changes in the brain that causes your reaction to lessen a little each time?

And why is it that you can sit alongside 2 or 3 people, all watch the same thing, yet have a different reaction among all of you? Why does something strike one person as totally hilarious, and maybe evoke just a smile in you?

I have a terrible sense of humor. I'm a bad one to put in your audience if you're trying out a new comedy act. Yet, show me The Three Stooges, and break out the Depends. I've sat laughing helplessly at those 20 minute shorts, while someone who's watching with me might be sitting stone-faced.

I thought about that all tonight. I heard one kid talking to another.

She said, "It was so funny at practice. Kelly went to pass the ball and fell right on her face. She went down. We had to stop practice cause she had to go to the emergency room. They said she probably broke her wrist. I was dyin' laughin'"

I didn't get it.