Ok so put your wet-suit on if you're going to read another word of this, because this is going to be like a weather report: partly whiny, with occasional grumbles, but clearing at the end of the day.
If you'll pardon me, 2008 has 90% sucked out loud. Very, very ungood, as I like to say. Now while I have a lot to be thankful for (for all you philospohers out there) it's my opinion that if you can't do what you want to for the people you love, then the resulting feeling is that things are pleasant-not.
Sigh
I have to admit though...I think it's me.
As my wooden coffee table is a dust magnet, I have been a mess magnet. But as a magnet attracts, I attract ungoodness...non-luck...anti-beneficial stuff.
Yeah it's me. I feel like I not only cause my own quagmire, I believe that I brought a lot of the yuck to people's lives as well. I come in the room, it's like that scene from "Ghost" where the demons come up outta the ground all black and moaning, and drag people off.
My career is in its infancy stage for the second time in my life. Only I didn't get to be 23 again to do it all over. And being all bent up and driving with that parking permit hanging on the mirror just serves to remind me how close I am to being a fossil.
So with that all in mind, I figure I have to make some changes. One of those changes is to start by fixing my attitude. I think it reflects on people when your mouth looks like it's full of salt, ya know?
But me turning into Jimmy Sunshine is going to take some work. Kinda like completely filling in the Grand Canyon. Will rake some planning and preparation. And probably some fertilizer.
The first thing I have to do is let it go. Spit it out, get rid of the venom.
That's not very simple ya know, especially if you've known me for a decent amount of time. You know very well that there are lots and lots of people out there whose sole purpose is to make me very mad all the time!
But I have to purge. I have to stick my thumb down my figurative throat and get it the hell outta there.
So...
Between now and the end of this miserable, stinkin' lousy rotten smelly year, I am going to spout about the things that always seem to be a thorn stuck in my tongue. We'll go one more round with all of them, and then start the new year all fresh and pretty and new.
Well, maybe not fresh and pretty and new. But you get what I'm saying.
I'll update about Gram as I can ok?
I've REALLY been working on my attitude too ... it's so dang difficult. Ya know, I'm perfectly happy until I get 'round difficult folks. I get along perfectly with everyone until the kiddos and husband come home! LOL
ReplyDeleteLORI
Sorry this year has been sucktastic. That's kinda how I felt about 2007. I really hope 2009 picks up for you.
ReplyDeleteIn the meantime, you have 2 weeks to get everything off your chest and unleash the venom. Hash away my friend!
BTW--do you run into the same people that I do (the ones that like to make me very, very mad and/or annoyed.....)?
The good thing is...2008 is almost over.
ReplyDeleteAnd you know what? You're ALLOWED to be whiney and grumbley. We've all had those years and you're right, they SUCK ASS.
::toast::
Here's to a mouth full of sugar in 2009! :)
I think you and I both have been paddling the boat against the current this year dear friend (At the very least you have someone in the boat with you). Yet as your doing, write it out, expunge it however you need. Holding all that crap in begins as you said to show up in your personality from time to time.
ReplyDeleteIn any event I will keep supporting, keep reading and being there for you, hoping the sun lets a glimmer through all the storms. I will also keep grams in my prayers on the smoke, and you as well. A little extra pleading on your part can't help (winks). Hang in there big guy, the year is almost over. (Hugs)Indigo
meant to say can't hurt...chalk it up to another duh moment. (Hugs) Indy
ReplyDeleteI wish you luck with your new endeavor! It takes a lot of courage to realize that you can improve your outlook, and then to make it happen.
ReplyDeleteAll my best,
Beth
Jimmy I hope 2009 will be a good Year for you ~ and you will soon be able to put 2008 behind you ~ I know if anyone can make something good happen you can ~ Ally x
ReplyDeleteI think 2008 sucked for a lot of us and gave us some real unhealthy attitudes. To be able to recognize and strive to change that is a step (or in your case a limp, said affectionately) into the right direction. Taking the step sometimes is all we have to do and if we trust and have faith, God will carry us the rest of the way. God Bless and prayers for your Gram.
ReplyDeleteBIG HUG Jimmy!
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry this year has sucked as for you. I barely even remember it.
ReplyDeleteNext year WILL be better.
I tried commenting on this the other day and it didn't work, lets see if it takes this time around. My best wishes to you in this endeavor. I've only been successful once in my endeavors to change my thought patterns. It felt like a gift from God and was life changing though. When it happens, it works, I can say that. I hope it works for you.
ReplyDeleteWe all have those bad years Jimmy, yours has had so much crap in it of late. I hope next year will see all of your plans come together and the sun shines on you for once. You've got a great family and I know you have the willpower to make positive things happen again, it's too easy to get stuck in a rut and sink deeper while trying to dig your way out but I know you can make it through. Let's forget 2008 and bring on 2009! Jeannette xx
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