Monday, October 29, 2007

I Could Use Some Input

Hi Folks. This entry has been edited. I had a problem that I wrote about, but I think it was a bad choice to post it here, because if it were discovered, it could cause problems for all the wrong people. So I decided to just clear the deck and leave it for another day.

Thanks to everyone who commented and offered input. I appreciate it.

11 comments:

  1. Anonymous2:14 AM

    When they call to say they are coming tell them what you need--like cleaning, laundry etc. Ask how many are coming and limit the number , "Pop can't take too much company". Does Pop have a wife---she could be like my daughter and I do"Stay out of the kitchen til dinnner is over--then you can clean up"--or whoever is the cook could do this. Be firm! Protect the patient, the house and your sanity!! Barb

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  2. Gaboatman2:16 AM

    Jimmy
    Yes, it sounds like a tough situation to deal with. I can see how you might dread a repeat performance.

    I'd call them up individually during the week and tell them it was great of them to come over to help out with Pop. I'd say that you just wanted to remind everyone that, even though it is great to all get together, you just thought that you should remind everyone before the next meeting that Pop is reason for the gathering and here is what needs to be done. Then, go over a list of things that the group can help with.

    Don't bring up the bad behaviour in the conversations, just let them know what areas you really need some help with and see how they respond.

    If they come over again and act the same way, just discontinue the get togethers. I'll bet they get the subtle hint, though. Good luck, my friend!

    Sam

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  3. Sam always has sage advise. I will also say before the eating even starts: HEY, let's let Pop and the Cook go first.......they are starved. Isn't it something how family can act? Here is another idea. Ask somebody to bring paper plates, somebody to bring a salad, etc. like a pot luck. Well, I've done that and people brought things like a small bag of chips for 30 people. Good luck! Anne

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  4. Anonymous6:40 AM

    Hi Jimmy, I agree with Barb....lay down rules/guidelines and a limit on number of people (definitely not the lay on top of one another duo!!) before they arrive and say that if they want to eat bring their own take-out, LOL!!! It must be upsetting for Pop as well to see everyone behaving like morons!
    Take care my friend and don't let them wind you up too much..!!! love Joan (aniracj@aol.com)

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  5. Anonymous7:01 AM

    Grrrrrr I think a phone call prior is in order. No need to revisit the bad behavior, maybe a subtle hint. Will subtle work? Good luck with this Jimmy.. I know it's a sticky situation.
    hugs
    d

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  6. Sorry I haven't been around lately...things are crazy. I am trying to catch up on your journal and get the impression that you are taking care of your dad....and the rest of these morons want you to take care of them too!!! (I say that with complete love....sort of....lol) I think you have to put your foot down NOW. Give them jobs to do, set the tone, take charge. If you let this get too far out of control, it will become a real madhouse!!!!

    GOOD LUCK!!! Dealing with family is never easy!!!!

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  7. Anonymous9:45 AM

    You have to get it out in the open. Not accusing, but rather, how they can help...with food, cleaning, whatever needs to be done. Make them feel that they are important as a group, and collectively, everyone is welcome. Be firm, but kind. If they choose not to visit, then you weed them out that way. Good luck...dealing with family is never easy!
    xoxo ~Myra

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  8. I had invited family over for dinner one year....and some of them brought friends. REally sucked since there was nopt enough food then for everyone to get a good portion. There should have been enough for everyone to have at least a taste BUT I went out to the kitchen to deal with pies in the overn...and when I came back, all the good stuff was gone.and they were complaining they were still hungry. I was so upset. So, the next year,when talking to people..I told them i needed a better head count so that I can plan better and we can all have enough food. Funny thing was the family that brought the most guests were insulted and have not been back for Thanksgiving since! LOL

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  9. They sound more like hindering than helping.

    Maybe you could make a job chart. Whoever broke the bicycle can have the job of repairing it. And the 'laying on top of each other' couple? Give them plenty to do since they obviously weren't busy enough....in the right ways.

    If people expect food, then expect them to bring something to contribute; and that means more than a 2-liter bottle or a bag of chips. No sense eating poor pop out of his pantry.

    You would think people would get a clue, but you and me both know some people are a can short a six pack (or two or three).

    I can tell you're the kind of person who can kick butt and take names. Use that power Jimmy! And good luck.

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  10. Anonymous11:14 AM

    Jimmy you have a difficult situation here ~ you will have to put your foot down and make sure they have come to help not hinder ~ sorry I havn't been around but with Lyn being so off colour I havn't been on the pc as much as I would like ~ Ally x

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  11. Anonymous4:02 PM

    Whatever you are struggling with (if in fact you are.. if it's more of an inconvenience then I send strength for that, too), I hope that it is resolved soon and that appreciation and consideration are given for all you've done and continue to do. I know you're not looking for it, but it should be given nonetheless because you deserve it, Jimmy.

    ;o)
    Michelle

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