Thursday, January 08, 2009

Clarity 1986-1991

After we married, B. and I started to enjoy our new "adult" life. Growing up in Queens, NY, we'd always lived a simple, but satisfying life, so our idea of "jet-setting" involved a honeymoon in Barbados, a trip to Disney World in Orlando FL and weekends in the Hamptons on Long Island during the summer. We were a good fit, she and I. We liked the same things, and grew to like more of the same things. We shared many of the same friends and spent a lot of time socializing and entertaining.

There was one little dark cloud in our otherwise sunny lives to that point. Part of B's plans included children and we were beginning to figure out that there was maybe a little bit more at work than just bad luck when it came to our lack of success in conceiving.

It was our first obstacle. It was something we needed to seek help for, but it was the first time we'd come across a problem we couldn't fix ourselves "with love alone". It wasn't, however, a situation where I was concerned about fixing blame. Not at all. But it did become an early sign that blame wasn't invisible to both of us.


  1. ::sings::

    "Getting to know you, getting to know all about you..."

  2. I'm enjoying reading up on life before the journal...Having said that I've been absent a bit myself. Turns out I couldn't have found a better time to tune into you. (Hugs)Indigo

  3. This is really interesting Jimmy, it's nice to read and learn about how life shaped you. Jeannette xx

  4. John calls the years before we were able to conceive my "black years". It's quite the emotional roller coaster.

  5. Jimmy I think it must be hard for you to write this ~ but please keep writing as I am anxious to read more ~ Ally x

  6. Anonymous4:02 PM

    I agree, i love reading all about you. I hope you keep this up, i love learning more about you my friend.

  7. Thanks for sharing this and letting us in on your earlier years.
    It does give us some insight to who you are and where you've been.

    Thanks and keep writing.


  8. I agree...this is like a good TV show where you just get involved and have to wait until the following week to find out what happens. LOL


  9. Jimmy, thanks for sharing. I think you are making some new friends here in Spotterville :o)

  10. It's good to understand a friend better.

  11. Oh my love...I can feel your pain in these words. But you know, somehow writing it down...purging yourself in a way is such a good thing. Keep writing. In the end you will find clarity, and finally maybe closure.
    I love you my friend,

  12. This reminds me that I should be VERY grateful that fertility was never a problem for my hubby and me.

  13. You know I can so feel your pain on this topic. :)

    I do have to say one of my favorite parts of catching up with you all at once is to see only me as your recent comments on your sidebar. It's like you are writing just for me to comment on it. :)


  14. I like getting to know you a little more....this is nice!
    I also went to Barbados for our honeymoon, but that was in '81 & of course spent many summers before & after in the Hamptons. Ü
    Hope all is well with you & your family~

  15. It's important, i think ~ to preserve the past so that we may look back and learn from it all that we can. There's no better time than the present to do that. It insures a better future... ::smile::

    Not only that, but it helps those who DO care and want to know you ~ well... KNOW YOU!

    Sorry i've been scarce... :o/


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