I'm Grumpy

I'm grouchy tonight. Nothing major, just very disagreeable. The following is a list of my opinions on various topics, as expressed only when I'm in a grouchy mood.

For instance, Esquire Magazine selected Scarlett Johansson as "The Sexiest Woman Alive."

Sorry. Don't agree.

She's beautiful alright, and hell, when you look, you can actually see that she is standing there, unlike so many of the Walking Lollipops who are populating Hollywood these days.

I mean, take a look over there on the left. That's Scarlett.

Now take a look over here on the right: i That's Nicole Richie.

But I'm grumpy, and there are a whole bunch of women out there that I'd consider so much "sexier".

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And I have noticed, more and more, that radio stations

are filling their air-time with tons of music from the 80's

and 90's. Friday night on one station is 80's Night,

till midnight, and then the other station plays

Weekend 90's.

Couldn't be because contemporary music SUCKS now, could it?

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I am, by nature, non-violent.

Just not my style. But the next mumble-mouth who starts spouting off about President George Bush is gonna get hit, hard.

Not because I'm the leader of the Bush Fan Club, or anything like that. Nope. I'm just sick of listening to the same bullshit rhetoric, day in and day out. He's the President until the next election. Can we talk about something else, now?

Now before any idiots come in here and start a Bush rant, I said it is NOT because I am the leader of the Bush fan club. It has nothing to do with my political affiliations. It's because I don't like repetitive babble. If everyone around me was babbling about Justin Timberlake, saying the same shit for 4 years, then I would have used Timberlake's name instead of Bush.

SO SKIP THE POLITICS.

(Oh, and I think Timberlake sucks too. That new CD bored the ever-lovin shit out of me. Cookie-cutter techno-pop. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.)

My attitude comes, in part, because three of the biggest damned whiners I know didn't vote in the last election.

You didn't vote? Shut up then.

Simple as that.

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Dane Cook, in my opinion, is great. My friend Cassie turned me on to this guy, and I watched his HBO Special "Dane Cook: Vicious Circle". Laughed my ass off.

That's right, my ass fell right on the floor.

The guy is funny, and his humor is creative and original. Meaning it's comedy above 3rd-grade toilet humor level.

About damned time.

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I think the next time the revise the "Endangered Species List", I think we should add "Integrity" to it.

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Ginormous is just a dumb word. We're inventing bullshit words every day. The only good thing is, there are only so many combinations of the letters of the alphabet. Granted, it's a huge amount of combinations, but eventually, every one will be used up. And we'll have no more words to invent.

Then the idiots will invent new letters of the alphabet.

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It used to be necessary to warn kids about copying from the Internet when doing schoolwork, because plagiarism is wrong.

Now you have to warn them that most of the shit that's returned by the search engines is completely wrong.

If you want to see what I mean, browse around Yahoo's "Yahoo Answers" pages.

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OK one last bitch:

I see a lot of forums, blogs, and journals where someone will ask for help with a problem, you know "where can I get one of these" or "how do I make one of those" and then, in the feedback, reply, or comments section, I'll see a whole pile of people contributing things along the lines of "I have no idea" or "I don't know, let me know when you find out".

Why would you write that?

In most situations, if you don't know the answer, you keep quiet, right? I mean, when the teacher asked a question in class, you didn't raise your hand to give "I don't know" as an answer, right? If you didn't know, you kept your mouth shut!

But seriously, when someone posts a request for help, why would you enter a comment that isn't the answer?

I'm curious.

OK night.