Sunday, October 29, 2006


God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can;and wisdom to know the difference.

This is such a recurring theme in my life; I come back to this prayer at least once a day, for some reason or another. Something occurs every day that makes me realize the value of such a request.

If you've had a job just about anywhere, it seems, there are things that go on that are unfair. Nepotism is a way of life in corporate America. If you get into the world, you deal with it, or you go insane. Or, you work somewhere that there is a family member who can grease the wheels for you.

If only life were really that easy.

I've come to grips with some of the less pleasant "facts of life". That is not to say they don't frustrate me, but I've learned to face the fact that I cannot change them. And I'm not talking about great injustices (although that is subjective), just the things that you could drive yourself insane trying to battle. Some are big, most are small.

Let me explain...on the "small" list are things such as these:

  • You will always get stuck behind a bad driver when you're in a hurry. The bigger the hurry, the bigger the idiot
  • It will always rain when you're counting on it not to.
  • The Internet will always fail you when you count on it for something genuinely important

Know what I mean? Things like those, take 'em or leave 'em, they're not going to change.

But it's the things on the "big" list that I had to struggle to come to terms with. I think I became more sensitive to some when I had children of my own, and the things that were always "unjust" became really unjust.

Again, to explain...

We can convince ourselvesand try to convince others, that real beauty comes from within, that looks don't matter, money doesn't matter, yet, at the end of the day, they often most certainly do matter. Way too many of us have suffered a little bit of "broken heart" when we lost out because someone didn't subscribe to those beliefs. "Hot" wins out over "nice" or "sweet" way more times than I'm happy with, but it is what it is.

Some people make horrendous life choices. You can't make their choices for them. You either dismiss them, or you wait to be there in case the choiced indeed prove to be horrendous. And you stick around when they repeat them, or you move on. People don't change because you want them to, and they're not always going to take advice.

The best qualified candidate doesn't always get the job. That's just the way that is.

Money talks. The government, big business, et al, are all driven by profit. Pure and simple. You make some inroads, but you deal with it. The recent idiocy with oil and gasoline prices had nothing to do with actual shortages, but speculation that anticipated shortages. They didn't happen, and look at gas prices now. Can't do much to change it, you just deal with it.

And as much as we'd like to think that we're responsible for our own happiness, that our lives don't depend on the acts of others to achieve happiness, it's small consolation when our hearts are broken, or when we are disappointed. We forgive and forget, or we hold a grudge. People do matter to our lives. We live with it, come to terms and move on, or spend a long time feeling very unhappy.

I wish I had the power to say to everyone that looks won't matter. I wish I could sit here tonight and guarantee that being the most qualified is going to guarantee success. I wish I could make all those thing "the way of the world". But mostly I wish I could grant that wisdom to know the difference.

It'd sure feel a little better. Some nights, being sad really sucks.


  1. Anonymous11:01 AM

    (((Jimmy))) I'm so sorry you are sad. I don't know what to say after reading this entry... I'm here if you need to talk.

    ~Jaime (ChaseNKids)

  2. ...uuurrgh..blogger...I wrote a lengthy comment about "the facts"..adding one, the fact that you will always get screwed switching lines, hopping in the "fast" line only to have it slow and the "slower" line moving like the speed of light..I too have accepted it all, saving myself my original set of teeth that otherwise would be mortar by now...I wish I knew then what I know now...more so...I too wish I could grant the wisdom to others saving them from my mistakes..unfortunately we all learn from screwing up..I am the SCREW UP Poster Child...graduated from the School of Hard Knocks..1st in my ride on a scholarship! :)

  3. Anonymous7:31 PM

    I think life may be about coming to terms and accepting our limitations as well as others. Damn! I'm not doing a good job! That well could be why I'm still alive....God keeps giving me more days to get it right.


  4. Hot wins out in the short-term; nice and sweet wins in the long run. Believe it.

    Being sad does suck, and I am sorry you are hurting.



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